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About Shymkent

Oh, oh! Fun fact—there’s this whore in old France, right? Named La Païva—she built a mansion from her, uh, “work.” Had a bathtub with THREE taps: water, milk, and champagne! CHAMPAGNE, DUDE! I’d bathe in mayo, tho—is mayonnaise an instrument? Nah, but it’d be squishy fun! She was all “I am my own master!” like in the movie, ya know? Total badass!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady walks in. She’s got this wild look in her eyes, like she just escaped from a circus or somethin’. She’s clutching a bag, and I’m thinkin’, “What’s in there? A pet raccoon?” Turns out, it’s a vintage fur coat from the ‘80s. She wants me to fix it. I’m like, “Lady, this thing’s seen better days!” But she’s all sentimental about it.