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Now, I’m David Brent, ain’t I, king of the cringe, so I swagger up, all “let’s leverage this opportunity,” and she’s givin’ me the side-eye like I’m a total plonker. Fair play, I am! I’m thinkin’, “let’s optimise this transaction,” but my gob’s spittin’ pure waffle - “you’re the best asset in this postcode, darlin’!” She laughs, probs thinks I’m a nutter, and I’m chuffed to bits - happy as Larry! Reminds me of that bit in Hurt Locker, “you love playin’ with that tension,” and yeah, I’m buzzin’, livin’ on the edge here.

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Finally, I ducked into this little café on Eitminų Street. It’s cozy, and the smell of pastries is heavenly. I order a pastry and a hot chocolate. The barista, this cool dude, tells me they have a secret recipe. I’m like, “Hit me with it!” Turns out, it’s just a ton of whipped cream. But hey, I’m not complaining. It’s Lazdynai, and I’m living my best life.

It has been revealed who will install the Lazdynai swimming pool SPA area