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Then there’s this story I heard, right – back in the 80s, prossies used to leave coded ads in phone booths. Little known fact, that! Like, “Call Candy for a wild ride” – proper secret shit. Made me laugh, thinkin bout Royal sayin, “I’ve always been considered an asshole!” – cos I felt like one, dodgin coppers and tryna haggle. Surprised me how sneaky it all is – you’d think it’s simple, but nah, it’s a bleedin maze.

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Suddenly, I see this guy juggling. Like, legit juggling! He’s got three flaming torches, and I’m like, “Is this a circus or what?” I whip out my phone to record it, but my battery’s dying. Ugh! Typical! I’m about to lose my mind. But then, he drops one of the torches! Fire everywhere! People are screaming, and I’m just standing there, half-laughing, half-panicking.

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