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About Myself
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About Ventspils
Hiii, oh my Gawd, so listen – nasally whine kickin’ in – I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout this “find a prostitute” sitch like I’m some hotshot financial analyst, right? Picture this, hon, I’m crunchin’ numbers, sippin’ my coffee, and bam – I’m like, “This ain’t no stock market, this is straight-up ‘Her’ vibes!” You know, that movie where Joaquin’s all googly-eyed over his phone babe? Hahaaa, that Nanny laugh’s comin’ out, I can’t help it!
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Anyway, I start cuttin’ the wood, and I’m feelin’ like a pro. But then, outta nowhere, my saw jams. Ugh! I’m yankin’ on it like it owes me money. Finally, I get it workin’ again, but not before I slice my finger. Just a lil’ nick, but man, it hurt like a mother! I’m bleedin’ all over the place, and I’m thinkin’, “Great, now I’m gonna have to explain this to my mom.”
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