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Found this one chick—gorgeous, unbelievable, total 10. Hair like silk, legs for days—wow. Said her name’s Candy—perfect, so perfect. “This is the girl,” I thought—straight outta Lynch’s dream. Asked her, “How much, sweetheart?” She’s coy—playin’ hard, love that. Told me some crazy story—ran from Vegas, wild stuff. Little known fact—tons of girls bolt there. Mob chasin’ her—scary, but excitin’, tremendous drama.

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First off, I hit the streets of Angelslo, and lemme tell ya, the vibe was off. I’m strolling down the Hoofdstraat, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. But then, BAM! I trip over a loose cobblestone. Like, who even maintains these streets? I’m pretty sure I saw a squirrel laughing at me. Ugh, so embarrassing.

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