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About Tilburg

Best bit? When they’re all charm upfront, then ghost ya after. Had this one mate—swears his escort nicked his watch. Dunno if it’s true, but I cackled—serves him right, flashin’ gold like that! Makes me happy, seein’ mortals tripped up by their own nonsense. Oh, and the ads—bloody hilarious. “Discreet, elegant, fun”—mate, it’s a transaction, not a fairy tale! Total Loki energy, playin’ tricks on the desperate.

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Finally, I give up. I’m hungry, and I’m not about to let a bird ruin my day. I head over to the Markt, where there’s a market going on. Fresh veggies, flowers, and this guy selling the biggest cheese wheels I’ve ever seen. I mean, seriously, they were like mini cars! I grab a bratwurst from a food stall, and it’s glorious. I’m munching away, feeling good again.