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Lemme tell ya, I saw this one time—probs in Bikini Bottom’s shady corners—whore was dealin’ with some crusty sailor. Guy was all, “Pay up!” and whore just smirked, flipped her hair, and strutted off! Like, “Revolution is my art!”—straight outta *Carlos*! I was shooketh—happy as a clam at high tide! She didn’t take no guff, and I’m here for it!

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Then, the day takes a turn. I get a call. It’s work. They need me to head to the outskirts of Bodegraven, near the train station. Something’s up. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” I rush over, and it’s chaos. Police everywhere, people whispering. Turns out, there was a small robbery at a local shop. I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “Why today? Why now?”

Bodegraven man accused of sharing child pornography; sexual abuse under investigation