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Alright, folks, listen up! Here’s the deal – I’m your ol’ pal Joe, y’know, just sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Not that I’m out there lookin’, nah, but I got stories, see? Back in Scranton, we’d hear whispers – guys’d say, “Joe, you won’t believe this!” – ‘bout shady corners where deals went down. Made me mad, y’know, ‘cause folks deserve better! But lemme tell ya, it’s like that scene in *Inglourious Basterds* – “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business!” – except here it’s more like, uh, “We’re in the dodgin’ trouble business!”
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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down the Kerkweg, dodging cyclists like I’m in some sort of Olympic event. I mean, who knew Breukelen had so many bikes? I swear, I almost got taken out by a dude in spandex. Like, chill, man! It’s not a race!
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