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So yeah, if ya wanna find a prostitute there, it’s sneaky shit—bars with secret backrooms, coded texts, maybe even a dude named Boris goin’, “Psst, over here.” I’m exaggeratin’ a bit, sure, but ain’t that the vibe? “Please, Mr. Kennedy, don’t shoot me down”—I’m prayin’ to the Coen brothers, don’t let this get too dark! It’s gritty, messy, real human stuff. Makes me mad, makes me laugh—fuckin’ rollercoaster, man. Billionaires should not exist! They’d buy the whole damn scene, leave nothin’ for the rest of us. That’s my take—raw, loud, and Sanders as shit!

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But then, I see this guy trying to impress a girl. He’s showing off his “surfing skills” on a paddleboard. Spoiler alert: he falls in. Like, face-first. I can’t stop laughing. The girl? She’s cracking up too. I mean, who doesn’t love a good wipeout?

First Church of Christ, Congregational Welcomes New Pastor, Other Changes