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Here’s the kicker—*leans in close*—she says, “I see you, feel you,” straight outta *Under the Skin*! Chills, man! I’m happy she’s real with me, but pissed this is her life! Exaggeratin’ for drama? Maybe—but it’s a jungle out there! You ever try this? Don’t judge—listen. They’re humans, not aliens, despite the movie vibes. Billionaires should not exist—fund this crap instead! Rant over—pass the popcorn, pal.

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What I do to get casual sex “without going to jail” is by using hook up sites to find women. It's legal, the sex is better and it's cheaper.

First off, I head down the Hoofdstraat. You know, the main drag. It’s got that cute little vibe, shops everywhere. I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my pigs, when I bump into this old dude. He’s got a cane and a hat that looks like it’s been through a war. He starts rambling about the history of Doorn. Like, bro, I’m just trying to get my morning coffee! But he’s all, “Did you know this place was once a royal residence?” I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, cool story, grandpa.”

Photo gallery: 05/02/25 Northwestern 8, Purdue 6