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So, where do ya start? Back in Russia—yeah, I’m a science nomenclature whiz, fancy title, huh?—prostitution’s illegal, but it’s EVERYWHERE. Like, Moscow’s got these secret spots—little known fact, bro! They call ‘em “tochkas,” shady corners where girls just… appear. I’m talkin’ 2 a.m., neon lights flickerin’, sketchy dudes whisperin’. Kinda thrilling, kinda creepy—like, “I need to see this through!” Straight outta Zodiac vibes. Made me happy, that sneaky rush—felt like a spy!

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Then I hit up the local bakery. Oh man, the smell! Fresh bread, pastries, you name it. I grab a couple of those almond croissants. They’re like little pieces of heaven. I’m munching away, feeling all good inside, when I overhear this couple arguing about... wait for it... the best way to make poffertjes. I mean, c’mon! It’s Eelde, not a cooking show!

Regional airports can take over dozens of flights from Schiphol