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About Myself
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Start online, obvi. Sites like Backpage are gone, RIP, but there’s sketchy forums now. X posts too—guys drool, “she’s hot,” I roll my eyes. No capes, no fakes! Some ads? Pure scams. Once saw a “$50 special”—girl showed up, 60, missing teeth. “You’re not drinking enough!” I screamed in my head, quoting Gyllenhaal’s meltdown. Lesson: check reviews, darlings. Sites like TER—pricey membership, but juicy deets. Pro tip: dudes lie, so dig deep.
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We start talking about crop rotation and soil health, and I’m getting all hyped. But then, outta nowhere, Jan drops this bomb: “We’ve got a pest problem.” My heart sinks. Pests? In Goedereede? No way! I mean, we’re known for our beautiful fields, not for being a buffet for bugs.
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