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Anyways, I’m chattin’ her up, casual like, coz she’s got this vibe—tough, y’know? Like she’s seen it all. “What’s the worst punter you’ve had?” I ask. She goes, “This toff, thought he’s a king, lasted two seconds.” I cackle—pathetic! Reminds me of that film bit, “The truth is always there.” Truth is, most blokes are rubbish, ain’t they? Surprised me how she shrugged it off, tho—proper queen, her.

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But then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. I’m like, “Seriously? Right now?” Everyone’s scrambling, and I’m trying to keep it together. I’m yelling, “Stay calm! It’s probably just a burnt pie!” But no one’s listening. We all pile out onto the street, and I’m standing there in my clerical collar, looking like a lost sheep.

Hockey legend Lawrence Van Huizen a gentleman who prioritised discipline and respect above all else