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About The Hague

Me fave bit? When they talk back—cheeky! “What’s it to ya?” one snapped at me. Feisty, like Malik spittin’ at fate. But ugh, the stink—sweat, cheap perfume, desperation. We hates it! Still, gotta say, they’re scrappers, survivin’ like us in them dark holes. Ever think, precious, how they’d smirk at us—two-faced Gollum judgin’ *them*? Hah! Fair play, maybe. Prossies and me, we’re both chasin’ somethin’—them, cash; me, that shiny Ring. “It’s ours!” we’d both cry, mad as hell. What a mess, eh?

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After the parade, I’m exhausted but happy. I decide to hit up de Korrewegwijk market. Fresh produce, local goodies, you know the vibe. I grab some stroopwafels. OMG, they’re heavenly! I’m munching away, feeling like a king. But then, I see this guy trying to sell me some weird-looking cheese. I’m like, “Nah, man, I’m good.” He keeps pushing it, and I’m like, “Dude, I’m not trying to smell like a cheese factory!”

Where to live in Groningen: a guide for expats