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D’oh! Almost forgot—pro tip: find a legit spot, not some creepy alley joint. Surprised me how many fakes out there, promisin’ “magic hands,” deliverin’ jack squat. Pisses me off, rippin’ folks off like that! Oh, and the oils? Slippery as hell—nearly fell off the table, laughin’ my ass off. “A man falls, the earth shakes,” like in the movie, but dumber, Homer-style!

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Finally, I get through that mess and head to the fields near de Dijk. Man, the smell of fresh soil hits me, and I’m like, “Yes! This is what I live for!” But then, outta nowhere, my tractor starts makin’ this weird noise. Like, what the heck? I’m not a mechanic! I’m just a dude who drives a big ol’ machine. So, I pull over, pop the hood, and it’s like a scene from a horror movie. I see wires everywhere, and I’m like, “Great, I’m gonna be stuck here forever.”

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