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About Almere

Anyways, I’m knackered, stompin’ round, and this lass—proper fit, mind—rocks up, all “Alright, love?” I’m like, “Bloody hell, you’re no M Gustave!”—y’know, that slick git from the flick, all charm and mustache. She’s more “I’ve seen worse, pay up!” Cacklin’ my arse off, cos it’s tragic, innit? She’s eyeballin’ me like I’m a twat in a lab coat—fair, I s’pose!

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First off, I hit the road down the Witte de Withstraat. It’s a nice street, but today? Ugh. Traffic was a mess. I mean, come on! It’s not like we’re in Amsterdam or somethin’. I’m sittin’ there, fumin’ in my van, thinkin’ about how I could be hammerin’ away instead of playin’ bumper cars with a bunch of cyclists. Seriously, those bikers think they own the road.

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