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I seen this one gal, right? Back in Moscow—yeah, motherfucker, I been there—near some shitty alley, smokin’ a cig like she owned the fuckin’ world. Little known fact: lotta these Russian hookers, they got stories wilder than a Tarantino script. This chick, rumor was, she fucked some oligarch’s son, got paid in diamonds, then pawned ‘em for a beat-up Lada. A Lada, motherfucker! Who does that? Made me laugh my ass off—pimpin’ ain’t always glamour, huh?
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Then, my boss, Mr. Jansen, walks in. He’s all chipper, like he just drank a gallon of coffee. He’s like, “Hey, how’s the analysis going?” I’m like, “Dude, my computer’s on strike!” He just laughs. I swear, he’s got a weird sense of humor.
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