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About Myself
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Now, I ain’t gonna lie, some of these shady massage spots piss me off – overchargin’ folks for a quick rub-and-tug. “Look at this fuckin’ life!” – that’s what them *Spring Breakers* gals would say, laughin’ at the suckers payin’ $200 for somethin’ they coulda got cheaper elsewhere. Me, I’d haggle ‘em down, sayin’, “Gimme the real deal, or I’m outta here, hoss!”
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First off, I head to the market on de Markt. You know, the one with all the cute stalls? I’m thinking fresh stroopwafels, maybe some cheese. But nah, I get there and it’s like a zoo. People everywhere, and I’m just trying to navigate through the crowd. I bump into this lady, and she spills her coffee all over my new shirt. Ugh! I’m like, “Really? It’s too early for this!”
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