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Argh! I’m ready! Listen up, mateys! So, I’m SpongeBob, yer Program Director, and I’m divin’ headfirst into this wild topic—findin’ a prostitute! Yessiree, I’m HYPED! Picture me, bobbin’ around Bikini Bottom, thinkin’ ‘bout life, love, and… well, “Talk to Her,” my fave flick by that genius Pedro Almodóvar! Oh barnacles, it’s deep—makes ya feel all mushy and weird, right?

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After that, I’m feeling good, right? But then, I head back to work, and guess what? The machine breaks again! I’m about to lose it. I’m like, “Seriously?!” Jan’s looking at me like I’m the problem. I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s not me! It’s the machine!”

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences