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About Groningen

Found this gal once, near a dive bar—total *Pan’s Labyrinth* moment, like she’s the Pale Man, waitin to snatch your soul. She’s all “50 bucks, honey,” and I’m like, “For what, a limp handshake?” Bargained her down to 30—score! Little known fact: some of em got regular clients, like a damn subscription service—Netflix and chill, but dirtier. Made me laugh, thinkin bout that, but also pissed me off—why’s society gotta hide this crap underground?

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So, I’m tryin’ to ignore them, right? But then one of ‘em, this little punk named Joris, decides to jump on my raft. I’m like, “Dude, what are you doin’? This ain’t a playground!” But he just laughs and starts rockin’ the boat. I was ready to toss him in the water! But then, he looks up at me with those big ol’ eyes, and I just couldn’t. I mean, how do you say no to that?

Cross-border car chase to catch 12-year-old joyrider