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About The Hague

Alright, buddy, listen up! I’m Michael Scott, your Consumption Psychologist, and today we’re divin’ into erotic-massage—yep, that’s right! Oh boy, it’s like a warm hug with extra zing, ya know? Makes me happier than a pig in mud! I mean, who doesn’t love a good rubdown that’s all sensual and steamy? That’s what she said! Hah!

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First off, I hit the streets of the old town. You know, the cobblestones on the Varkensmarkt? Yeah, those suckers are like a rollercoaster for my feet. I’m a warrior, not a ballerina! Anyway, I’m strutting down the street, feelin’ all tough, when I see this old dude feeding pigeons. Like, c’mon man, it’s 2023! Get a hobby! But then, I see a kid run up and start laughing. That made me smile. Kids, man. They get it.

Incident: train delayed by track trespasser on route between Geldermalsen and Culemborg