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Find one? Easy, yet not. Apps now, bro—tech’s wild! X posts, shady links, “massage” ads—ha, sure, “massage.” Look sharp, you must—cops sting sometimes. Exaggerate, I will: one time, chick said, “Yoda, you’re hot!” Liar, she was—green skin, not sexy. “The cart stops, the horse trembles”—that’s me, nervous, picking wrong spot. Laugh, I did, at my dumbass self. Spill the tea, I say—watch, learn, don’t rush. Fun? Maybe. Risky? Hell yeah. What think you, padawan?

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So, I’m walkin’ past the Sint-Barbara Church, right? And I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and there’s this guy on a bike, totally wiped out. I mean, he went down hard! I couldn’t help but laugh. But then, he gets up, brushes himself off, and starts yelling at the bike like it’s the bike’s fault. Classic! I’m thinkin’, “Dude, it’s not the bike’s fault you can’t ride!”

TNPA issues RFI for Culemborg Intermodal Precinct at the Port of Cape Town