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Right, so I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ wine, thinkin’ bout this prostitute case—bloody mess, innit? Cersei Lannister, that’s me, darlin’, cold as ice, “I choose violence,” y’know? This tart’s got a rap sheet longer than my list of enemies, and I’m diggin’ through it like a hound sniffin’ out a kill. Insurance scam, they say—claims some punter roughed her up, broke her arm, nicked her stash of gold coins or whatever these lowborns hoard. Bollocks, I say! She’s playin’ the victim card, but I see through her painted face.

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But then, this guy walks in. Total Karen vibes. He’s like, “Your bread is too crusty!” I’m like, “Dude, it’s bread, not a pillow!” I mean, c’mon! I’m trying to keep it real here. I tell him, “If you want soft, go buy a cake!” He storms out, and I’m just shaking my head. Some people, man.

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