Avery Zelhem Whore ❤️

About Groningen

What pisses me off? The sanctimonious pricks judgin’ ‘em. Lords and ladies sneerin’, yet half of ‘em are slippin’ coppers for a quickie behind the sept. Hypocrisy stinks worse than a privy in summer. Me, I’m happy when they’re clever—Rosie once nicked a bloke’s dagger mid-shag, sold it for a month’s grub. Smart as a whip, that one. Surprised? Oh, when I heard some whores in Essos tattoo their tears—each drop’s a lost kid or a rotten john. Gut-punch, that. Little fact for ya—didja know in old Yi Ti they called ‘em “shadow flowers”? Poetic, innit?

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But then, bam! I bump into this dude, right? He’s all like, “Hey, you’re that anticorrosion guy!” I’m thinking, “Wow, I’m famous in Zelhem!” But then he starts ranting about how his bike is rusting. Like, dude, I’m not a miracle worker! I can’t save your rusty bike. I mean, I can help, but c’mon!

Toni Bou achieves a fourth consecutive season win in the Netherlands