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Last time I tried—total disaster. Guy next to me, “Hey, she’s mine!” I’m like, “Buddy, calm down, I’m not *that* desperate!” Felt like a scene from *Carlos*—tense, sweaty, “The revolution is now!”—except it’s just me, arguin’ over nothin’. Pretty, pretty good laugh after, though. Pro tip: don’t haggle, they hate that. Learned it the hard way—got screamed at, felt like an idiot. “You think this is a flea market?!” No, lady, I’m just cheap!
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After that, I needed a breather. I headed to the IJssel river. The view is just gorgeous. I sat on a bench, watching the boats go by. It was calming, you know? But then, this seagull swoops down and steals my sandwich! I’m like, “Seriously?!” I’m fighting with a bird over lunch. What’s my life?
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