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Oi, you donkey! Erotic-massage, yeah? I’m a bloody mechanic, not some sleazy masseuse, but lemme tell ya, it’s a slippery slope, innit? Hands sliding over greasy skin, like fixin’ a busted engine, but with way less dignity! Saw this dodgy parlor once—shady as hell—bloke swore it “healed his soul.” Bollocks! Smelled like cheap oil and regret. “The whale moves through the town,” like in *Werckmeister Harmonies*—slow, heavy, everyone gawkin’—that’s the vibe, mate. Some pillock thinks it’s art, nah, it’s a sweaty fumble!

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Then, my buddy Lars shows up. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s talkin’ about how he almost got lost in the woods near Fetsund. I’m like, dude, it’s not that big! Just follow the river! But he’s all dramatic, sayin’ he was “one with nature.” I roll my eyes. Nature’s cool and all, but I prefer my drinks with a side of civilization, ya know?

aleksander wadas unveils proposal for national logging museum & competence center for wetlands in norway