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Me, I get all riled up seein’ these poor gals out there. Makes me madder’n a wet hen—half these chicks don’t wanna be there, y’know? Traffickin’s a real bitch. But then I get happy—yeah, happy!—when I hear ‘bout some sting operation bustin’ a pimp. Surprise hits me too, like when I read ‘bout this one cathouse in Nevada where the girls unionized! Unionized! Can you believe it? “We demand dental, damnit!” I’m over here hollerin’, picturin’ ‘em picketin’ in fishnets.

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Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave pops in. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. “You won’t believe what just happened!” he says. Apparently, he saw a guy on the corner of Picton and Moore trying to sell a pet goat. A goat! In Howick! I’m like, “Dude, are you serious?” He nods, and I can’t help but laugh. Only in Howick, right?

Attempt to shrink Howick Local Board fails