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Ooooh, me fave bit—makes me laugh, it does! Some geezer on X posted, "escort’s like a bad ex—won’t leave ya alone!" Hiss! Withdrawal’s a beast, yesss—head zaps, screamin’, "I will not bow!" like Solomon facin’ the whip! Me nods, me knows, seen it in trials—folk beggin’ fer mercy! Me quirks? Tap me foot thinkin’ ‘bout it, hummin’—drives me mad, precious, but can’t stop!

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Finally, I’m exhausted. I decide to chill at a café on ul. 1 Maja. I order a slice of cheesecake—because why not? I sit outside, people-watching. This couple walks by, and the guy is trying to impress his date with some lame jokes. I’m cringing hard. Like, dude, just stop. But she’s laughing, and I’m like, “What’s wrong with you, girl?”

Reports of Jewish cemetery desecration in Poland false, officials say