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But lemme tell ya, some whores—shady as hell. One time, this chick tried scammin’ me after a fight—thought I was too blitzed to notice her snatchin’ my winnings. “Don’t pee on my leg, honey!” I barked, grabbin’ her wrist. She bolted, but damn, I was impressed—sneaky lil’ minx! Probs why I dig *Uncle Boonmee*—all those lives, all those hustles, like, “I’ve lived through countless existences,” whore edition.

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Then, I bumped into my buddy, Tomek. He’s always got the craziest stories. He told me about this wild party last weekend. Apparently, someone tried to DJ with a potato. A potato! I mean, how does that even work? We laughed so hard, I almost spilled my cappuccino.