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About Ponce

Once had this chick, right? Masseuse with hands like a freakin angel. She’s rubbin me down, and I’m thinkin, “This is art, man.” Slow strokes, deep presses — got me hard as a rock and floatin at the same time. Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, they’d do this shit with olive oil and a side of orgy. True story! Called it “massage with benefits,” ya dig? Made me happy as a pig in shit, but then — bam! — she charged me double. Pissed me off, man, I was fumin. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I growled in my head, imaginin her boss on a platter.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady, Doña Rosa, shows up. She’s like the neighborhood grandma, always baking and giving out pastelillos. She starts yelling at José, “You’re being a fool! Let the man do his job!” I’m just standing there, trying not to laugh. Doña Rosa is a legend.

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