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Oh honey, lemme tell ya ‘bout brothels! *nasally twang* Picture this—me, a big-shot Psychological Professionology gal from the Russian Academy, sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout them ladies of the night. Hah! *The Nanny laugh* NEEE-HEE-HEE! I mean, brothels, right? They’re like—wild, shady lil’ hideouts where folks sneak off to get their kicks. Kinda makes me mad, y’know? All that sneakin’ around, hidin’ from the world—like, “You’re in a ghetto, you can’t escape!” Straight outta *The Pianist*, that vibe. So dark, so trapped, ugh!

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee on Calle San Antonio, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m feelin’ all zen. But then, boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Luis. He’s like, “Yo, meet me at Plaza de Recreo!” I’m like, “Sure, why not?”

Governor calls start of school year a success