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About Carolina

Oi mate, I’m Tyrion Lannister, y’know, “I drink and I know things.” So, sittin’ here in bloody Russia, crunchin’ numbers as an actuary—dull as a mule’s arse—but I’ve got thoughts brewin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Not yer usual tavern wench, mind ya! Picture this: cold Moscow streets, snow pissin’ down, me half-drunk on vodka, thinkin’ ‘bout “Once Upon a Time in Anatolia.” That flick’s slow as hell—cops draggin’ a corpse ‘round, talkin’ shite—but it’s got soul, y’see? “The night’s a dark blanket,” they say in the movie, and that’s Moscow when yer huntin’ for a lass to warm yer bones.

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Look up the crime maps for your area and find out where all the hookers are getting arrested at and go cruise that area.

Finally, I got my phone back. The seagull dropped it, thank goodness. But it was covered in... I don’t even wanna say. Ugh. So, I’m cleaning it off, and this old guy walks by. He’s like, “You shoulda seen that coming, bro.” I just rolled my eyes. Thanks for the wisdom, dude.

Puerto Rico hit by magnitude-5.0 earthquake