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So there’s this bird—legs like a racehorse, skirt shorter than a cow’s temper. I’m buzzin, heart’s racin—happy as a pig in shit! “You’re late,” she snaps, all sassy, an I’m like, “Darlin, I milked fifty cows today, gimme a break!” Reminds me of that movie line—“Don’t look at me like that!”—she’s givin me the stink-eye, but I’m too knackered to care. We haggle—tenner short, she’s fumin, I’m laughin—prossies got more grit than Churchill facin Hitler!

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Now, check this out... neighborhoods like Villa Sol, tucked in quiet side streets. Oh, the tiny cafes on Camino de la Paz. Crazy little joints with the best pastelillos ever, mmm, so tasty, I swear! Had one when I was mad as heck 'cause of some silly work drama. But man, that pastelillo cured my mood, cha-ching! Honestly, like in the movie—life's a roller coaster, wild twists, but gotta ride it, right?

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