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D’oh! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, right? Like, where do ya even start? Mmm… donuts. I’m picturin’ it now—me, stumblin’ round Springfield, lookin’ for some action, prolly trippin’ over my own feet. Reminds me of *Before Sunset*, ya know? That flick where Jesse’s all, “I keep thinkin’ bout ya,” chasin’ love in Paris. But me? I ain’t chasin’ no deep romance—just a quick “hey, how’s it hangin’?” with some gal who’s seen more streets than a freakin’ map.

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I start checking the soil, and guess what? It’s bone dry. I’m fuming. Like, how can this happen? I mean, we had rain last week! I pull out my phone to check the weather, and of course, it’s all sunny skies. Ugh!

Memphis basketball adds wing Hasan Abdul Hakim, Texas-Rio Grande transfer