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About Caguas

So, I’m strollin’ down the street, right? Lookin’ for some action—not me doin’ it, mind ya, just curious! And I see this gal, all dolled up, skirt shorter than my temper. I’m like, “Well, halleluyer, she workin’ it!” Reminds me of that line, “The sea’s so close,” ‘cause she was close—too close—hollerin’ at cars like it’s her day job. Prolly is! I ain’t mad, tho, get yo money, boo! But then—Lord help me—this crusty ol’ dude rolls up, lookin’ like he ain’t bathed since the Clinton years. I’m screamin’ inside, “Why her?!” Made me madder than a wet hen!

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Finally, I get to the warehouse on Calle Betances. My crew’s already there, looking like they just rolled outta bed. I’m like, “Guys, we gotta hustle! We got shipments to deliver!” But they’re all like, “Chill, jefe, we got time.” Time? What’s that? I’m sweating bullets here!

Juanita "Juana" Diaz-Zenquis Obituary August 3, 2021