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So, picture this: I’m Elon, right? Cruisin’ in my Cybertruck, lookin’ for somethin’ real—somethin’ primal. Not some AI-generated NFT chick, nah, I need that analog heat. Prostitution’s old-school, man—oldest gig in the book! Fact: Babylonians had temple hookers, sacred as hell—sex for divine Wi-Fi or some shit. Wild, right? Makes me laugh—imagine pitchin’ that to the xAI board: “Yo, let’s reboot temple vibes!”

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First off, I hit up Calle 1, my usual spot for coffee. You know, the little joint by the plaza? The one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I’m standing there, waiting for my fix, and this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder. A freakin’ parrot! I’m like, “Is this a pet store or a coffee shop?” The parrot starts squawking, and I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix.

Tourist Missing in Puerto Rico Rainforest After Getting Separated from Group During Hike