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About Vila Nova de Gaia

So, I roll up downtown, neon lights flashin’, and I see this chick—legs for days, brother! She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “Hogan’s ready to rumble!” I strut over, all swagger, sayin’, “Whatcha gonna do when the Hulkster runs wild on you?” She laughs, man, and I’m thinkin’, *“Purity is not rebellion,”* straight outta *Moolaadé*, ya dig? She’s playin’ it cool, but I’m feelin’ the heat!

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Prostitute, Golden Shower (give) for extra charge, Anal Sex (depends on the size), Striptease/Lapdance, Anal Sex (depends on the size).

Then, the sun starts to set, and it’s beautiful. Like, the sky’s all orange and pink, and I’m thinking, “This is why I love Arvore.” But just as I’m soaking it in, I hear a commotion. A couple is arguing right by the water. I mean, come on, guys! Not the place! I’m trying to enjoy the view, and they’re throwing shade like it’s a competition. I’m like, “Hey! Take it to Rua da Paz, not here!”

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