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We chat, and she spills some tea—says back in ‘89, cops busted a ring run by a dude named “Mad Dog,” who drove a souped-up Chevy like he was in *Fury Road*. Hilarious, right? Guy probly thought he was immortan Joe or some shit—total clown! I’m crackin’ up, but also sad, ‘cause she’s out here dodgin’ creeps like him every night. I’m like, “Mediocre!”—throwin’ shade at the system, ya know?

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So, I’m outta bed, chugging my coffee like it’s the elixir of life. I step outside, and boom! The smell of fresh pão quente hits me. I’m like, “Yes, please!” I grab a couple of those bad boys from the bakery on Avenida da República. Best decision ever.