Sophie Castanheira Do Ribatejo Sex Dating ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Okay, so I’m scrollin’ X the other night—procrastinatin’, naturally—and I see this post: “Sex-dating tip: bring condoms AND a charger.” I laughed so hard I nearly choked on my coffee. Pretty, pretty good advice, though! Battery dies, mood dies—tragedy! Made me happy, y’know, seein’ some wit in this cesspool. But then—THEN—I match with this chick, total smokeshow, right? We’re chattin’, it’s goin’ great, and she goes, “I only date guys who’ve seen ‘The Royal Tenenbaums.’” I’m like, “Honey, I AM Royal Tenenbaum—minus the tax evasion!” She ghosts me anyway. Ghosted! Me! I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “This is not a world-class sex-dating story!” I was pissed—PISSED! Wasted my best Wes Anderson vibes on her.

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I grab my gear, and we start blasting. The noise is insane. I’m in my zone, but then I notice this kid, maybe 10 years old, watching us from the street. He’s got this look on his face like he’s seen a ghost. I wave, and he just stares. I mean, c’mon, it’s just sandblasting, not rocket science!

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