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So, I’m trollin’ the alleys, wine in hand, thinkin’—where’s the fun at? This one time, I found a girl, right—swear she was a bloody vision. Hair like fire, smirk like she’d rob me blind. “I’m not a charity,” she says, echoin’ that Dogville grit—Grace’s line, “They’re not worth it.” Made me laugh, ‘cos she was worth every penny. Paid her double, just to spite the world. Happy as a pig in shit, I was—surprised too, ‘cos she didn’t nick my dagger.

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Next, I decided to explore the old town. The narrow streets, the colorful houses, it’s all so charming. I walked down Rua do Lameiro, and I swear, I felt like I was in a postcard. But then, I tripped over a cobblestone. Classic me. I fell, and this group of tourists laughed. I got up, brushed myself off, and said, “Yeah, I meant to do that!” They didn’t get my sarcasm. Whatever.

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