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So yeah, motherfucker, that’s my take—brothels are messy, wild, fucked-up history lessons. You step in, you’re in a damn movie—*Melancholia* style, waitin’ for the planet to smash us all. What you think, huh? Crazy shit, right? Ding—elevator’s stoppin’, I’m out!

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Moimenta da Beira is also the land of the apple, the best apple in the world, which inspires Expodemo, a huge festive event that takes place every year in mid-September. It’s also home .

Finally, I hit the button. I’m live, and I’m trying to hype up Moimenta-da-Beira. “Yo, check out this town! We got the best wine, the coolest people, and the most beautiful views!” I’m feeling it, you know? But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, really? I’m under a tree, but it’s not helping. I’m dodging raindrops, trying to keep my gear dry.

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