Ruby Tabuaco Whore ❤️❤️

About Almada

Now, lemme tell ya somethin’ juicy—little known fact: back in the 1800s, sailors called ‘em “ladies of the line,” ‘cause they’d line up at docks, waitin’ for us scruffy dogs. Ain’t that wild? History’s got sass! Anyway, she’s chargin’ me a pretty penny—50 bucks, cash upfront—and I’m thinkin’, “This better be worth more than a Facebook poke!” I’m happy as a clam, but then—ugh!—this drunk jerk stumbles over, yellin’ at her, “You’re mine!” Made me so mad, I almost decked him. “Back off, loser!” I screech, nasal as hell, laugh bubblin’ up—HA-HA-HA!—like I’m on set with Mr. Sheffield.

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Tabuaço is a village of 6, people in the Alto Douro wine region of Trás-os-Montes e Alto Douro, northern Portugal. Mapcarta, the open map.

Finally, I get home, and I’m exhausted. I flop on the couch, and I’m just thinking about the day. It was wild, emotional, and honestly, a bit ridiculous. But that’s Tabuaco for ya. It’s got its quirks, its chaos, and its charm. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

International award for Tabuaço hotel and winery