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Oi mate, lemme tell ya ‘bout prostitutes, yeah? Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – they’re out there, workin’ the streets, ain’t they? Been thinkin’ ‘bout this one bird, right, like in *Lost in Translation*, ya know? “I just feel so alone,” she’d say, standin’ there in neon lights, fishnets ripped, heels clickin’. Makes me bloody heart ache, it does! Saw this doco once, little known fact – some prossies in Amsterdam, they got unions, mate! Unions! Fightin’ for rights, like “Oi, gimme a break, yeah?” Blew me mind, that did.

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The inmates were rowdy. I mean, I get it, they’re locked up, but c’mon! I walk in, and there’s this dude, Carlos, trying to start a fight over a game of cards. Like, really? You’re in prison, and you wanna throw hands over poker? I had to step in, and let me tell ya, I was fuming. “Guys, chill! You’re not in a movie!”

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