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About Cluj-Napoca

Had this one time, right, proper lush massage. Bird knew her stuff – hands like bloody wormholes, suckin’ stress outta me. Felt like floatin’ in space, “an endless black pool” – movie line, spot on! Made me happy as a pig in muck. But then – surprise! – she starts whisperin’ prices for “extras.” Cheeky cow, nearly ruined the buzz. Thought to meself, “Is this seduction or a bloody scam?” Like Johansson lurin’ lads to their doom.

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But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re lost, looking at a map like it’s some ancient scroll. I can’t help it. I’m like, “Hey, you guys need a GPS or somethin’?” They laugh, and I feel like a hero for a sec. But then, they ask me for directions to Poiana Brașov. I’m like, “Uh, just take a left at the big statue and keep going.” I mean, who doesn’t know that?

Aro Palace Brașov joins international hotel group Hyatt