Ruby Faraoani Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Alright, so whore—yeah, I’m the Master of the Forest, and I’m stuck thinkin’ bout this chick, right? Dr. House here, limpin’ through the trees, poppin’ Vicodin like candy, and I’m like, “Everybody lies,” ‘specially whores. Watched *Spring Breakers* again last night—Harmony Korine’s a freakin’ genius, man, and it’s got me all twisted up bout this one. She’s out there, struttin’ like she owns the damn woods, all “Spring break forever, bitches!”—that’s her vibe, y’know? Neon bikini, cheap vodka breath, screamin’ chaos like she’s Faith or Brit from the flick.

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I finally find shelter in this little shop on Strada Victoriei. It’s cozy, and the owner is super nice. He offers me a towel and a hot tea. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a lifesaver!” We start chatting, and he tells me about the history of Faraoani. Did you know it used to be a big trade route? Crazy, right? I’m learning so much, and I’m just sitting there, sipping my tea, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.