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I got into this scene once—mate of mine swore it’d fix my back. Walked in all skeptical, like, “This some dodgy spa crap?” But nah, this chick’s hands? Magic. Like she’s kneading dough but it’s my soul gettin’ worked. Little known fact—ancient Greeks were mad for this, called it “anatripsis.” Warriors gettin’ oiled up, not just for flexin’ but for healin’. Wild, right? Bet they didn’t expect it’d turn into this sensual shindig.

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But then, I get a call about a parrot. A PARROT! I’m like, “What’s next? A snake?” I can’t even. I’m exhausted, but I can’t say no. So, I head out again, thinking about how I need a vacation. Maybe I’ll finally go hiking in the Rodna Mountains. Or maybe I’ll just sleep for a week.

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