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Erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin, nah – it’s art, proper sensual voodoo. Little fact for ya – them ancient Greeks, yeah, they was at it, callin it “body worship” or summat. Blew me mind when I read that, like, “Sharon! Them old geezers knew the score!” Makes ya feel all tingly, don’t it? Them hands kneadin ya, slow like, tension meltin – I’m screamin inside, “What a bloody treat!” But then, some dodgy parlour tried chargin me double – got me fumin, mate, I was spittin nails!

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Finally, I get to the café on Strada Unirii. My go-to spot for a caffeine fix. I order my usual – a double espresso – and the barista, bless her heart, spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But she laughs it off, and honestly, it made me smile. I mean, who doesn’t love a little coffee drama, right?

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