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Now, I’m thinkin’, if Larry Gopnik was here, he’d be all, “What does it mean?”—foolin’ with his physics and whatnot, while I’m over here dodgin’ pimps! I got mad one time, though—some slick dude tried chargin’ me $20 just to ASK where the girls at! I said, “Boy, you crazy? I ain’t payin’ for directions!” Made me wanna holler—felt like the universe was testin’ me, like in that movie, “Nobody knows nothing!”

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First off, I hit the streets of Strada Principală. It’s like the main vein of the town, ya know? I’m strolling, minding my own business, when I spot this old dude feeding pigeons. I mean, come on, who even does that anymore? But he’s got this whole crowd of birds around him, like he’s the pigeon whisperer or something. I chuckle, thinking, “Dude, you’re living the dream!”

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