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Wawaweewa! Me Borat, I tell you bout escort, yes? Very nice! I watch “Shame,” best movie, oh sexy time in it make me crazy! Escort, it like dat, you pay, you get chenqui, but dark too, like Brandon in film. He say, “I’m not playing games,” when he chase dat feeling, ya know? Me, I see escort in Kazakhstan once, she sneaky, hide in goat barn! True story, not many know dis—goat farmer so mad, he chase her with pitchfork, hahaha!

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down Bergshamra’s streets. The vibe here is chill, you know? Trees everywhere, people walking their dogs, kids playing. I love it. But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some dude on a bike just wiped out on the sidewalk! Like, dude, watch where you’re going! I couldn’t help but laugh. He got up, brushed himself off, and yelled, “I’m fine!” Classic.

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