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Sometimes I wonder, tho—what’s the masseur thinkin’? “Oh, another back, whoop-de-doo?” Haha, probs not—they’re artists, sculptin’ ya into mush! Still, once this chick rushed me— “Time’s up, lady!”—and I’m like, bitch, I paid for *zen*! Pissed me off, but whatevs, most times it’s heaven. Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” I’m tellin’ ya, it’s a naughty lil’ secret worth tryin’—you’ll thank me later, doll!

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So, I rush over to the park, and there’s this little corgi running around like it owns the place. People are chasing it, and I’m just standing there, laughing my head off. I mean, who knew a dog could cause this much drama?

Moving the Goalposts | The day Hammarby Women took 7,000 fans to an away game – and won the league